Weekending with Amanda @ Habit of Being Saturday:
Nola and I spent the morning peacefully pottering around in the garden.
I read a little and we curled up for a little nap before lunch.
We had a quiet afternoon.
In the evening Tani took them all to see "Visualise" a performance art duo, at our local theatre.
It was very exciting to go out to the theatre while it was almost dark!
The girls returned home with bright eyes, balloons and lots to tell! Visualize, mime their whole act so their performances are very mesmerizing to watch. Sunday:
We headed off to Woolsthorpe Manor, the birthplace of Issac Newton.
We wondered around the house, learnt about Issac Newton's life.
Visited the room where he was born and the room where he discovered that light is made up of every colour.
They had also preserved a "graffiti sketch of a bird that he had etched into one of the walls as a child!
At least I know it's not just my kids that draw on the walls!
The girls even found some windfalls from the very orchard that incpired Issac Newton's discovery of Gravity.
The rural crafts that were on show were really interesting.
The girls struck their own coin, and saw a blacksmith at work.
We all had a lovely long conversation with a wooden spoon maker.
He was such a wonderful inspiration!
He had been carving spoons for 50 years and loved to share his art with young people who had an interest.
Emmy and Boo told him all about the wooden spoons and buttons they had made and he gave them lots of advice on which timbers work best for which spoons and the best ways of preparing the wood.
We bought two of his spoons.
The wood carries a buttery texture and is infused with a soulfulness that is rare to find.
When we asked him if he had an on line shop he laughed , "No! I still have one foot in the swamp."
How nice to find a crafts person who works for the simple love and joy of passing on a tradition!
{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A
single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple,
special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and
remember.
At last we are getting back into a comfortable rhythm. The cool and cosy glow of Autumn is filtering through and casting it's gentle homely calm across our world.
No more hectic, post Summer catch up. No more feeling like I'm falling behind all the time. Instead we are embracing each moment as they come in all their colour.
Sometimes I feel like I'm hanging onto that time when they were all little and everything was done in unison. We experienced the day together moving from one activity to another as a collective.
Now the girls are very keen to explore their own particular interests and spend time more individually on their own pursuits.
It can sometimes feel less consolidate and coherent that way, and of course their are those moments when 5 little people are all creating their various versions of chaos throughout the house and I wonder if there will ever be a clear counter top or table again. But then I see how they are immersed in their work and I feel a warmth deep down in my soul.
It is a good feeling.
Today Bujana found a ladybird which led to a self styled detailed study on the seasonal behaviour of insects.
I just love how one small intersection can branch outwards and upwards with seeming spontaneity.
Look at this little Lamby... She love to pod peas byt carefully "unzipping" their little jeckets and plucking each sweet pea from it's pod :)
And did you notice the fleece?
Yes am now the proud owner of a whole sheeps worth of "Fleece in the Grease" with all the added extras that comes with :S
It is stewing in a tub for it's first rinse as I write!
Stay tuned...More to come on that...
My husband thinks I 've finally gone loopy. He's slow to catch on isn't he!
It started because I’d been thinking about writing and how often our perfectionism gets in the way of our words. And I figured, why not take 5 minutes and see what comes out: not a perfect post, not a profound post, just five minutes of focused writing.
Word for today"FOCUS"
What I focus on expands, grows and becomes my truth.
What I focus on becomes the way I see the world.
It becomes me.
My focus seems to shift like plates beneath the earth.
Between a hundred different voices calling my name,
I rush in and out of focus, my focus blurs in the motion
...and often, I loose it.
What I focus on is such an intentional thing, such a foundational thing.
So I focus on the new lessons being learnt,
Thesqueals of delight instead of the mess of paint and paper strewn about the floor.
I focus on God, when the world tells me there are more important things to do.
I focus on the flowers she plops in a jam jar rather than the trail of muddy footprints she brings in with them.
And it's not that I don't attend to the physical things that need attention, it's just that I'm seeking that which lies beneath them.
Unschooling sounds like a strange and radical term. Yet in practice it is simply the concept of life learning.
Unschooling defines learning as a process, a becoming and something which enriches your mind, body and soul.
It is the way human beings have naturally learned for millennia. Learning through practical application, in response to natural need.
Learning by example from family and community in security and love.
Learning seems to happen effortlessly when we are all simply engaged in our own passions. Coming together at various times to share our pursuits and interests with another, or to collaborate on projects.
Often the main lesson of the day, for both the girls and I, is a lesson in connection and authenticity.
When I find myself pushing and shoving the girls into work they find irrelevant, we all burn out.
And all there is to show for the effort is a pile of scratched in worksheets for "proof"
And the peace that is meant to be at the heart of it all is left wanting.
Am I motivated by fear or love?
Our learning journey is focused on priorities. I want to be mindful of what really matters most to us as a family and as human beings.
This usually means relationship, soul and authenticity come first.
Learning grows organically from nutrient rich soil.
The nutrients of our soil are
Gentle rhythms
Strong connections
Healthful food
Spiritual practices such as prayer, and meditation
Creativity
Handwork
Nature
Community
A wide variety of experiences and learning opportunities
When we trust our natural rhythms and our bodies needs things work out for the best.
Learning to integrate our bodies natural rhythms to seasonal rhythms is an important part of connecting with our bodies. We celebrate the changing seasons of the year with crafts, songs, nature walks and cooking.
Over the weekend we read "Children of the Forest" together and had much fun replacing the Summer nature table with treasures for the early Autumn nature table.
Boo's Papier Mache rainbow bowl full of shells was replaced with Emmy's hand woven willow basket for acorns, conkers and all manner of Autumn treasures we shall find over the next couple of months.
We lit Matilda's lantern and sang an Autumn verse.
The girl's made a little fire out of sticks and yellow leaves and our friendly witch sat on a tree stump for a cup of tea!
We also made a felt leaf garland, and the girls had a lot of fun taking it in turns choosing and threading their own Autumn leaf.
We read aloud, practiced pieces of music, wrote stories, plays, poems and baked good warm
food.
From gently watered roots branch, leaf and bud grow strong.
I channeled some of the creative energy that has been building up over the last week or so into my newly carded and plant dyed Lincoln Long wool, oh, the bliss.
House stepped a little over the comfortably messy mark into the just too messy mark while I was lost in my creative "zone".
This Mama grumbled a little about it while scurrying about shoving little pieces of wayward chaos into cupboards and drawers, And then internally grumbled about grumbling.
Some outdoor refreshment was required, garden play and an impromptu dolly tea party with invitations and everything.
The girls get lost in their own world so quickly, and often the less adult intervention the better.
Beatrix Potter Rabbit Tales before bed ended the day on a gentle note.
Sunday:
Tani and I went to The George in Stamford for afternoon tea as a birthday treat (for him)
We had full high tea with sandwich selection, some Victoria sandwich and scones with cream and jam finished off with a lovely glass of champagne.
Does teatime get any more special?
A pianist was playing as we sat in the courtyard which created a beautiful ambiance.
Afterwards we went for a walk by the river and identified our future house with it's own little moored up lugger.
Disclaimer... I don't think homeschooling is the "perfect" solution.
And I don't think it's right for everyone, all children, families and people are different and need different things.
Everyone has to follow their own truth and what they know is instinctively best for their own families. Every path is different, this is just ours...
My ideal set up has never really been exclusive homeschooling.
It isn't a perfect solution by any means. In my ideal world, my girls would spend a 3 hour day at school from 7 years and up, with lots of time for unstructured play, family time, community time and extracurricular activities afterwards.
Classes would be small and there would be more parental and community input in teaching with at least a couple of teachers for each class.
Schools would look more like homes, less formal, more inviting and relaxing.
More value would be given to the arts and humanities than there is presently.
There would be more opportunities for vocational and practical learning.
Careful attention would be given to the aesthetic quality of the school grounds.
Children's emotional and spiritual needs and the needs of families would be prioritized over formal academics.
There would be far less pressure, more flexibility and absolutely no testing for under fourteens. I also think it would be wonderful if teachers could be given more freedom in their teaching.
Funnily enough, I wanted to be a teacher for many years. My husbands parents are teachers, as are many of my friends, both inside the homeschooling community and outside of it.
Teaching is probably more of a vocation than a profession. I have so much admiration for teachers.
Most teachers have a deep love and compassion for children and want to help nurture them in every way they can. Yet the system is set up to make things difficult for them to achieve this.
Often teachers are unfairly made into the scapegoats when things go wrong.
I know most people within the system are trying their best to work for the good of children, parents, families and community.
It is simply very hard to balance the needs of individual human beings with the needs of a system that deals in standardization and generalization.
No path is perfect
I'm not a hard and fast rule kind of person, and have been on all sides of the fence at different points in my life, which makes it impossible for me to judge another persons story.
I have been single working mum, married mum, teen mum, formula feeding mum, breast feeding mum, unemployed mum, natural birth mum, c section mum, homeschooling mum and school run mum!
But just like you, I am not the sum of the labels put on me.
The words that follow are just a part of our story and a little bit of background for those who have asked us how and why we came to this place.
We all have our own story which we have to live and tell and by sharing we can only enlarge our perspectives and our compassion for one another.
I thank you in advance for grace :)
So here is a little about our story...
We decided in 2008 to start homeschooling our girls. We "Unschool" (using the term loosely) because we also embrace much of the educational philosophies of Rudolf Steiner and Charlotte Mason in our day to day life.
So here are some of the reasons why we chose to take "The Road Less Traveled."
So how did we come to this decision?
My little girl loved her Montessori style nursery and I assumed she would fit right into school too!
Yet as soon as she started it seemed her' little light went out, she just changed.
She cried every morning and was so tired as soon as she returned home that we hardly had time together anymore.
She begged me not to make her go to school. I looked into my four year old's eyes and wondered what it was all about really...
Priorities
It seems that more than ever children are driven to achieve "learning goals" not so much for learning's sake but to tick boxes. Information is absorbed and memorized in order to past standardized tests. However, the emotional, physical and spiritual development of the whole child is often not prioritized as much as their academic achievements.
By the time GCSE's hit there are so many facts to remember, so much info to process, learning has become more superficial and more about quantity that quality and depth.
Lessons on friendship are often formalized rather than modeled.
Rather than engage the whole child the system tends tomagnify and value the part that can memorize random facts and follow instruction unquestionably.
Inflexible Systems
When they were at school, my children's natural love for learning was crushed by the rigidity and bureaucracy of the school curriculum, so full of tests, and exams, and grade scores.
My eldest began to equate her value as a person with how she performed at school.
However the time she was 9 her school had really cut back on art, craft and drama lessons and instead focused almost solely on sat practice papers. Due to this the school had a great reputation for performance, yet this was at a real cost to the children's learning.
Different Needs
Each one of my children has learned to read and write at different ages.
My third daughter had mild speech delay and didn't begin to show an interest in reading until she was about seven.
In hindsight, I'm so grateful that she was given the time and space to learn to love books without anxiety or pressure.
My fourth daughter can't sit still.
Whenever she is thinking she has to move about.
Although this would probably be considered difficult behavior in a school setting it is something we can easily accommodate at home.
My second daughter began reading at the age of three. When she still had to do the same simple phonics work as her other classmates she quickly became disengaged and bored with the work. Once we brought her out of school she could begin to learn at her own pace.
A Holistic Approach to Nurture the Whole Child
I fear that children can lose the sense of who they really are at heart in the relentless pressure to conform, perform and show a strong "front" among their peers.
During my eldest daughter's last two years at school she was bullied daily. Although we tried to intervene countless times, little was done to resolve the situation.
This only compounded her feelings of powerlessness.
She passed her 11 plus which meant that she could go to the local grammar school. Whether to send her or not was an agonizing decisions as it was meant to be one of the top performing schools in the area.
We eventually decided to home school her simply because she was adamant that she wanted some time to find her strength and herself again.
As parents we wanted to support her in all ways, not just in terms of her academic future.
Fitting in
My daughter told me many times that she felt she often had to pretend to be "someone else" in order to fit in.
Children need time, security and acceptance to fully form their egos so that they can become confident and well adjusted adults.
Some children are strengthened by the intense social life school affords, others are weakened by it.
Happily, I have seen my lovely, lively, passionate, strong, creative girl, return over these last 4 years.
Too Young
I believe that starting school at 4 and spending 7 hours a day away from their family at such a young and vulnerable age is emotionally strenuous for children.
To cope they are often forced to repress their natural desire for the nurturing that both family and familial surroundings offer.
They have to diss-associate from their bodies needs.
They can only eat, go to the toilet, rest, talk, move around and play at specific times, with permission.
This is hard for small children to understand.
However good a school may be and however gentle a teacher, nothing can replace a Mother's arms when you fall and hurt yourself and nothing can replace your own little bedroom when you want some peace to, sleep rest or play quietly. Even my 8 year old likes to nap for an hour or so in the afternoons and I am glad to be able to accommodate her need for this.
Over Scheduled
Children are desperately over- scheduled these days. There is no time for downtime, imaginative play, unstructured activity, daydreaming, or just plain thoughtful wonderment at the world around them.
Many studies have proved that the lack of "downtime" impedes many aspects of normal child development.
Downtime means being able to switch off and feel 100% comfortable in your surroundings...
Yet we as parents feel all this pressure to make sure our child is "equipped" to compete in the job market.
So we push, and we feel the strain and the stress.
I know because I feel it too. But this is not what life is meant to be about.
Somehow we have all got caught up in these lies and they have become self perpetuating.
Real Life
We are not powerless and I don't want my children to feel powerless. We can create a life that nourishes and sustains us at a deep level.
It always makes me wonder when people say that schooling prepares children for "real life."
However well fitted and furnished, classrooms are an artificial environment for children who need days
filled with the outdoors, nature, real work and community to thrive.
Memories
I don't want the memories of my children's childhood to become a blurred mosaic of classrooms, playground politics, scheduled activities, car journeys, chores and homework. I want their days to be slow, full, rich and warm.
A Soulful Life *
I want my children's memories to be full of warm, family moments. Wonderment at nature.
I want to give them the opportunity to learn the things that will matter most in time to come.
Not random facts and dates but depth of knowledge; wisdom and understanding, compassion and inner resourcefulness.
Freedom, Respect and Autonomy
I want to give them the freedom to find topics they are deeply interested in discovering more about.
I want my children to discover and experience real life, not text book
life. Have adventures, volunteer, serve in their family and community,
concentrate on their true passions.
I want my children to be free thinkers.
Not sheltered, but nurtured,
in an environment where they can blossom into the unique and wonderful
flowers they were designed to be.
More than anything I want them to find their truth and build the courage to have fidelity to that truth.
Simplicity
I want my children to take joy in the simple things. Find beauty in the everyday!
Faith
Above all I want them to have the space and the silence, the encouragement and the light of a simple yet deep knowledge of their spirit. A life that will "give them the ears" to hear, to discern and to hear the small, still voice of the sacred in their hearts.
The gentle sound that starts with a whisper, deep down inside the soul of a person; the soft breath that guides, teaches, counsels, comforts and heals.
The Voice that bestows wings and unrolls a big, beautiful, endless blue sky right to the edges of their horizon and beyond in which those wings can take flight.
But right now we are just taking one day at a time.
Connecting, growing, creating.
Seeking beauty in the ordinary
and joy in the simple things.
Broadening the parameters of learning?
Changing Education Paradigms?
Here is an interesting collaboration between Sir Ken Robinson and Animate.
