Tuesday, 12 August 2014

Unschooling - {A Day in the Life}

Inspired by Amy of the beautiful blog "To Love" I thought I'd write a little about how homeschooling has been going this year.

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This past year has been the year where I really shed my expectations and conditioned ideas about what school can be.

I had intuitively felt we were carrying too much baggage but was afraid to let it go.
So now "officially" we don't "do" school. We just live.
And it is enough.

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As the years have ticked by I have learnt to trust my instincts more and more.
 I have begun to work with my body not against it. It's need for nutrition, rest, and movement are more valued than before.
 The children naturally work with their bodies needs much more instinctively than I do.
They also don't have any guilt issues around taking a nap, or moving, playing, eating, drinking when needful.
I have found that by being aware of our bodies we are able to naturally self regulate into healthy patterns.

Trust is a big thing in all this home schooling malarky.

green dream

I think modern life has made us lose touch with our bodies and our natural instincts.

We deprive ourselves, push ourselves, then indulge carelessly until the guilt makes us feel shamed enough to begin the purging cycle once again.
These cycles can be related to eating, cleaning, exercising, working, consuming, and other addictive habits.
Unrealistic expectations, and relentless multitasking all atrophy our connection with soul.
I could write an entire post on how modern media, WiFi, the culture of fear, pollution, bad nutrition and the systematic secularization of the sacred are numbing our ability to connect with our spirit but  I'm aware that I'm already rambling far too much already.

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What has all this got to do with school?

When I was at school a teacher of mine used to say, "lessons are not just learning facts, they are training for the mind."
What kind of training could this be I wondered ? I still wonder this now. Do I want to "train" my children? Do I want to be "trained". Not so sure I do.

Although without a doubt I've been conditioned into a belief system which has very hardwired and narrow views on what is natural and healthy for a small, growing human being. I
t has been such a long process of "letting go". Letting go of my preconceptions about what being human is and finding my feet without fear.

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So how does this work in practice?

Here's a little peek into a one of our days.... How about yesterday?

Well yesterday We woke up around 7.
Kids all came into bed with us, we chatted, they got hungry, Emmy and Boo took the younger ones down, made breakfast ate.
Boo brought Tani and I a couple of scones and some tea. Tani and I chatted a bit on our own, then got washed and dressed.
Tani went to work. I made us all more tea. Girls were playing with Fina's new birthday toys. Before long lot's of half drunk cups of cold tea began to litter the draining board to keep company with the loitering breakfast bowls.
Emmy went upstairs to work on some content for a local business blog that she writes for.
I read picture books with Nola.
Nola went for a nap.
Fi began stitching a teddy bear from a kit she received as a  birthday gift while Boo, Tilly and I took it in turns to read aloud from The Hobbit.

Tilly and Boo did most of the reading while I got to grapple with at least one knotted thread every five minutes :)

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We took a break, Tilly went outside to play tennis with Fina.

I went on Pinterest with Boo. Boo likes reading the quotes. She wanted to know what this one meant so she printed it off, took it downstairs, found definitions for the words she didn't understand and we talked about the meaning of the quote, the language used, the context and time in which it was written and whether or not she agrees with it and why.

Tilly came inside a bit sad because Fina kept hitting the ball too high and lost it in the hedge.
I got to go on a treacherous ball finding expedition.

I ask Tilly to help me make salad and pittas for lunch. We have some very interesting and artfully shaped peppers for our salad bowl.

I remember, out of the blue, that we didn't do morning prayers because I didn't want to interrupt the girl's morning play. Wonder if I should suggest them now. But....

Nola wakes up, grumpy and hungry. She eats half the salad off my plate and pushes her own on the floor "accidentally" when I suggest she might like a salad all of her very own.

Girl's ask if we can go out. It's drizzly and rainy. I do some quick mental maths and realize we would only have an hour before getting ready for tennis anyway so decide to stay home.

Emmy practice's a new piece on piano. She is trying to teach herself from grade 6 to 8 this year so she can take the exam without the expense of lessons. Her beloved teacher retired last year and as we are saving like crazypeople this year we're going to hold out.
It is not as easy as she thought it would be, but we get lots of free impromptu classical performances.

 Boo gets her lap harp and finds a harmony and they work together on a piece.

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Matilda, Nola and I check the plants and take notes on how the veggie plot is coming along.

We talk about which flowers are blossoming and which need dead heading. Nola gets a little overexcited with the dead heading part, and harasses the rabbits somewhat till I agree to sit one on my knee for her to pet.
We talk about the difference between perennials, biannual and annuals. And Matilda squeals with delight at the new baby leaves that are beginning to grow on her African Violet cutting.

Fi bounces on the trampoline and squeals and chatters and shows me a number of impressive "Circus Tricks" that she is going to do when she finally joins the circus, ( a perfect occupation for her I think) and then squeals some more.
She does this a lot.  Bouncing mainly, but squealing too! and chattering....Oh the chattering!!!

I have tried to force her to sit down and work with me on her reading and maths before, but she simply can't do it. And if she does do it she'll be a spring unsprung afterword and quite out of sorts.

I'm glad we can wait until she is developmentally ready to take an interest in books.
She is such a free spirit and a beautiful, strong, effervescent soul. I don't want to dowse that.

I tell the three middles to put their tennis clothes on and collect their rackets . Adding as an afterthought oft neglected.... ( REMEMBER TO FOLD THE CLOTHES YOU'RE WEARING BACK INTO YOUR DRAWS...UNLESS THEY ARE REALLY FILTHY INWHICHCASE THEY CAN GO IN THE LAUNDRY BASKET!!!)
In the gentlest, calmest of tones of course....Ahem.

I get Nola changed.
Boo cries and cries whenever I brush her hair, so I chop about 3 inches off the tangled ends and promise her she can choose a style on Saturday and I'll give her a proper grown up haircut.

I wrap a handful of banana muffins that Tilly made a couple of days ago and fill a couple of bottles with water and we head out the door.

We get to tennis about 5 minutes late as usual.
While Tilly And Fi are at Tennis. Emmy, Boo, Nola and I visit a friend.
She is having an art class and Boo and Emmy watch while I take Nola out in the garden where she fills her pockets with "beeeful dones" "beautiful stones".

Then we say farewell, pick up the two stragglers and drop Boo off for her lesson.

When I arrive home a friend who is staying with us has graciously washed up and started dinner.
The girls watch "Kristen's Fairy Garden" and I tidy up a bit and go and have a cup of tea upstairs on my own.
Tani and Boo arrive home. We eat. Tani drops Emmy off at her scout group because they are having a camp this weekend and she is a young leader which means she gets to do all the camps.

It's a beautiful rainy evening. I love the sound of rain outside at dusk. The leaves of the sycamore are emerald and sparkling.

We say prayers by the window I light some candles. Nola keeps trying to touch the candles so they are quickly blown out. The sacred moment is undermined somewhat by little wriggly, squirmy, girlie.

Tani takes the girls to bed. I work on some knitting and sewing for my shop downstairs.
Once girlies' are "eventually" asleep (or at least not running in and out of one anothers bedrooms on important covert missions such as finding their special chicky, or retrieving a long lost book.) Tani joins us and I work and we chat and drink a glass of red wine, till around midnight. I come upstairs read a blog post or three and fall into the loveliness that is complete darkness and silence of those moments before sleep overcomes.

And thus, I present one random day among many :)


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I think the essential ingredients to our home school are these.

  • Working with and not against our bodies needs.
  • Trusting my instincts and being flexible.
  • Creating a home where beauty is honoured and mess is embraced.
  • Strewing, and exposure to many different things that will ignite their curiosity.
  • Facilitating and supporting  their passions.
  • Reading and learning from living books.
  • Saying Yes to the children! As much as possible.
  • Remembering to also say yes to myself which might mean saying no to them at times.
  • Learning how to work together while honouring the differences between us.
  • Lots of outdoor time, even if that's just garden play.
  • Art and Crafts.
  • Time for friends and community.
  • Making a conscious effort to learn from and respect other cultures, belief systems and perspectives.
  • Doing less. But doing with a sense of  purpose and meaning.
  • Allowing natural day to day life to be the primary teacher. 
  • Making time every day to honour the sacred and holy.
  • Integrating the sacred with the everyday; making  everyday work a form of prayer

dappled things






Sunday, 3 August 2014

Lovely Link Ups


Monday:

A Field of Wildflowers - #Small Wonders
Lavender Cottage - Mosaic Monday 
Pumpkin Sunrise - Weekending

Tuesday:         
Frontier Dreams  - Keep Calm & Craft On
Spirit of Simplicity - Tuesday Afternoons

Wednesday:    
Small Things - Yarn Along   
The Pleated Poppy - What I Wore Wednesday
My Memory Art - Black and White Wednesday
          
Thurday:
Little by Little - Little Things Thursday
Like Mother, like Daughter  - Pretty, Funny, Happy, Real 
Recuerda Mi Corazon  - Haiku My Heart
 
Friday:
Natural Suburbia - Creative Friday 
A Soulful Life - Soulfood Fridays

Saturday:           
D'Verse - Poetry Link Up 
Sandra Heska King - Still Saturday


Sunday:
Wooly Moss Roots - Gratitude Sunday 
One Dad 3 girls - My Sunday Photo


Weekly:
 Practicing Simplicity - {52 Project}


Monthly:

Gingerlilytea - Siblings

 

Tuesday, 3 June 2014

Waldorf Handwork Philosophy

 

 The traditional Waldorf stages are defined as...


  • Hands/Will/ Angels, ( 0-7)
  • Hearts/Imagination/ Artists (7-14)
  • Head/Understanding/Scientists (14-21) 

 Handwork is important in all these stages.

 (0-7)
In the stage of Hands/Wills/Angels (0-7) handwork can be taught through modelling where a child can watch an adult work around them and absorb it naturally. 
A child will also be more interested in exploring the feel of materials rather than actually designing or fashioning them into a finished product.
Supervised play with clay, bread dough, soft wool roving and natural seed pods, stones and shells is a perfect introduction to handwork at this age.

(7-14)
Here handwork can be used as a tool to spark the imagination. The child can begin to learn how raw materials are grown, harvested and processed. Children can discover how fleece is washed, carded and spun into yarn. From this deep connection to the natural environment children can begin to learn simple weaving, felting, finger knitting, knitting, crocheting and sewing. 
Projects can be carefully designed, planned and slowly worked through week on week. 

(14-21)
Young people may enjoy designing their own patterns and projects at this stage. This is also the perfect time to introduce traditional crafts such as pottery, metal work, wood work and glass work. Many local artisans are happy to offer workshops. 

An Emphasis on understanding the journey not just the destination.
In Waldorf schools, children are given the opportunity to see the process of creation from start to finish.
An example of that is getting the children to collect local sheep fleece. They wash, card and spin the fleece, plie it to create yarn and then create something beautiful and useful from it such as a knitted scarf or a crocheted bag.
 Maintaining the vital connection between product and process is essential if we are to remain mindfully compassionate about the choices we make as consumers.
 


Connections between Process and Product
The connection between process and product is also something I want to integrate into our homeschooling day.
So often we can get too caught up on the finish line, the target, the result, when really the process of creation is where the essential learning takes place.



 Honoring the Integrity of the Work

Boo has been learning this lesson well as she weaves her little rope basket, day by day, inching around a circle, two stitches forward and one stitch back!
At first it was really hard for her to undo any work that was messy and could be improved on. She became very attached to the idea of "just finishing".
Now undoing and redoing are something she takes on board much more easily and through it she gives her work integrity. 


Making Each Stitch Count
How many times in life will we have to make each stitch count for its own sake?
Ultimately, the integrity of a whole life's work rests upon the love given to the single stitches that weave it into one piece.


soft fleece still smelling of the pasture
the spinning dervish of the drop spindle

twirling in the same motion as the spheres both great and small.


uniting all stranded fibres, all distracted threads

Simple

beautiful
Double finger knitted into strands.
"Spring Primula's"
"Maid Marion Handspun Garland"



Sunday, 1 June 2014

Perspective

“And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

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There are those days when a whole box of cereal launches itself across a kitchen floor before a lucid words been spoken.
And the sound of bickering seems to overcome the deepest silent prayer of a sleep deprived mother.
The clatter of dishes spill out of the sink to migrate into and eventually conquer all known kitchen surfaces.
And somehow though coffee seems to be the only known cure to a hundred ills, a hot cup becomes startlingly illusive.
But then...
The baby smiles, a milky breathed smile.
And the light catches that scatty cereal flinging girls hair.
The one with all the answers comes quietly beside me. "I'll read them a story while you get the baby dressed."
And suddenly the gauze lifts.
The veil drops.
I see.
I see again.
The gifts that unwrap and unfold all around me. Enfold me. Unfold me. Unwrap me.
I am not the one in control of this carousel. I can't wave the wand like Mary Poppins and clear up every mess.
Make all the pieces fit. This life is a kaleidoscope. One small movement and the whole picture changes once again.
I can't  outmaneuver it, contain it, hold it under my thumb.
No my place is hands free and heart full.
My place is to Love.
Through flying boxes of cereal. Through tears and tantrums. Through multiplying dishes and receding surfaces. Through every cup of stone cold coffee.
I can love.
And love will find me, and them, and bring us closer, truer, kinder, stronger.
Despite it all.
Because of it all.

Friday, 11 April 2014

Impromptu end of week stream of conciousness

  • Staying in bed, reading while listening to little girls play in their bedroom as glorious butter yellow sunlight slides lazily under the blinds...
 
  • Two big girl's opened up the sofa bed last night and slept with the dog between them, I hear them scuffling about downstairs, probably in search of breakfast.
 
  • Emmy's got a new part time job helping to look after a lovely little girl in the mornings, Matilda has been keeping her company which has been really nice. The little girl has special needs and Emmy takes her for walks and outside garden play as she loves being outside. Emmy is really enjoying the experience and seems to be growing more independent by the day with a schedule, coursework, friends and activities all of her own. Scary! No it is all good. Really. I get the odd moment of tearfulness as I realise my big baby isn't really a baby anymore but I know she's just where she's meant to be. I trust in her. I know she will find her way, she knows how to listen to her soul. She has decided she wants to save up for a narrow boat and live on a canal. A perfect life for her I think, so long as she doesn't wander off too far, for too long of course.
  • Emmy's herbs - re - planted after Sylvie ate the last ones!
  • These past few weeks have included lot's of saying yes, and letting the girls explore and organise their own time freely. Now that they are getting older, more independent and their requests can converge and co-exist more seamlessly and easily it is much easier to "unschool."  Little ones, toddlers and babies in one house together with one caretaker need more structure and routine (at least in our home) in order for everyone's needs to be met and appreciated. It was far more of a skillful balancing act a couple of years ago and the more gentle rhythms of the waldorf early years mixed in with plenty of free play offered constancy for all. As they grow, the more free flowing ways of unschooling are fitting us well. I feel more and more in my heart that this way really works wonders. It creates a much more peaceful atmosphere, our relationships work naturally and I seem to have more clarity. I question more and more the subtle pressures that drive feelings of guilt. The ideology behind why certain knowledge is valued and other knowledge is not. Wondering about what makes a whole person? A happy person? A fulfilled person? I think many of the answers can be found in our hearts, we know them already, we've just learnt not to trust ourselves.
 
  • I've had to get less precious about the house again, which was hard because it is my nest, one I've prayed for, longed for, ached for my entire life. This house has given me a centre for my heart to put down roots and send out shoots. I feel a sense of belonging here that has previously eluded me in other places that I've lived.  So it is a home, a working, living, breathing space. I'm there now :) Even though I've compassion for the fact that I'm a homebody who likes all my crayons set up in rainbow order before I even begin to draw :) I know that the joy of this space is the presence of children in it with all their wonderful messes and even their not so wonderful ones! We've found a rhythm which, for me, is just a synonym for balance; balance between all our needs. As the children get older I find that I can ask this of them more and more. As they've always been around the different jobs that I do such as cooking, cleaning and laundry, they have naturally joined in with the work according to their abilities and age. I find that I am spending more and more time in thought and less in the "to - do" list. I am tentatively finding my deep thought tracks again, though many Autumns have obscured them beneath layers of hummus and leaf, they are still there. My brain is not the complete mush I half suspected it might be :) Tani and friends that know me irl may disagree.
 
  • I've found that in our family morning's have to be relaxed, full of creativity, Sylvie walks and whatever you feel like - that way it's all out of our system and we can get on with more structured or necessary things in the afternoon. I used to try to plough through the mornings and then feel too tired for the inevitable (unwound spring - crazy) in the afternoons. If one sentence has helped me more in my homeschooling journey than anything else it is this: One - Thing - At  - A - Time. And sometimes just one thing per day! It has been like a mantra. One story, explored fully. One baked cake, measurements, discussed and experimented with, a tea party arranged, a room cleaned. A movie watched, re-enacted, drawn. A poem read, discussed, inspiring homegrown poems to spring up like shoots from warm earth. A trip to the playground and park. A photograph taken, photo shopped, printed.
 
  • But then again everyday is different. Some days are chaos from start to finish and I feel like I'm just mopping up spills and winding up unravelling threads.
  • I'm getting better at relaxing over squabbling. The girls hardly squabble at all when needs are met and they have adequate freedom. And when they do it is okay, it passes. Sometimes it comes in drifts and a succession of days will involve bickering. But I've learnt all things pass and they need to find their own voices, and learn what words create what consequences. They all have their foibles, as we all do, but they are really good friends most of the time. Boo is a thinker, Matilda is sensitive, Fina is exuberant and boisterous, Nola is busy and Emmy is a teen who often needs her space but they have found ways to navigate their differences and appreciate them. Boo often tells me that Fina makes her feel brave. Emmy says she loves how the having little ones around has allowed her to remain a child for longer than she would have. And of course Nola loves the attention that comes with being the baby. They love one another deeply and truly and they play far more than ever they argue and I feel lucky for that. I know they will always have one another and not feel the isolation that I have in my mothering journey. If one of them gets upset the others flock around like a gaggle of goslings looking to do whatever they can to make all things well. The other day Tilly was sick and the others made her get well soon cards, cups of chamomile tea and gave her foot massages. Nola even scrambled upstairs with her nurse hat on back to front and her special doctor bag full of plasters scattered like breadcrumbs behind her.
 
  • Sometimes I'll suggest something that I think they'll like. Last week the three middle girls loved exploring circles and triangles making three dimensional drawings using this book.
 
  • We also picked some daffodils and a hyacinth and painted them together.
  • We've read a chapter a month from this book, looking up all the wildlife and plant life it mentions on the i-pad  and then tried to identify them when out on walks.
  • Of course the root children is featuring regularly again. It is a Spring fixture in this house, and the  girl's always explore every tree root and hollow log to see if they can spy a root baby hiding there.
  • And then there is the chapter of Anne of Green Gables before bed. That we all look forward to at the moment.
 
  • I've also found that clip boards are great for out of doors drawing and wondered why we haven't thought to use them so much before.
 
  • It's lovely that the three oldest girls can take Sylvie for walks around the village, getting to know people, saying hello to other dog walkers and stopping to feed the horses a handful of grass.
Fina the friendly dragon

  • Sylvie is growing big and scruffy and bouncy!
 
  • Right, it's taken me all day (in bits and pieces) to write this, now it's about time to get the tea on :)
  • Wishing all a happy Weekend!
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Monday, 24 March 2014

So be at Peace






"So I asked Fr. Langford: What did Mother Teresa do when it seemed that there was more work than she could possibly handle?
His response was simple and wise, and it marked a turning point in my life. In his reply to my email, he wrote:

The [work she could not get to] she did not think twice about, nor should you or I, since God is not asking you to do what He does not give you the time (or health, or resources) to do. So be at peace."