Monday, 21 September 2015

New Routines and Random Ramblings

Our sunflowers have finally made an appearance!

 I sometimes feel like my life is a thread weaving in and out of many things, the roles I play, the appointments I keep, the work I accomplish, and the everyday routines I follow.

There are many facets to our beings.
My internal voice changes with each movement.

Sometimes it's loud and agitated, especially when we need to be somewhere in 5 minutes and I've just realized there are no matching socks in my house and the dog has once again hidden someone's shoe in the garden.

Sometimes it is clarified and fragile, like when I sit and watch birds skitter about,  trees rustle, or read a poem with just the right words at just the right time.

With family and old friends, my inner voice is playful and childlike.
But when I'm new to something, it suddenly becomes cautious and safe.

Am I both of these things, or is one voice not as real as the other?

I'd love my  social inner voice to be open and centered. I'm working on it and most of the time I think it is. I'm much more keen to simply settle into being myself, it's the path of least resistance. It's hard work trying to be someone else and I'm lazy.
I also crave authenticity.

Some people are Blackbirds who can just let go and sing, or House Sparrows that can flit from branch to branch chirupping and chattering away as they dance their beautiful, dance.
When caught in a crowd I'm more like a wild eyed Hen Pheasant searching for a gap in the hedge in which to scuttle.
Sometimes I like to just be quiet.

I used to go through brief periods of voluntary muteness as a child and, when I did,  would feel suddenly released into the simplicity and peace of my inner world.
Strangely, it was then that I would feel closest to my real voice too.

In random group situations such as waiting in the playground to pick kids up from school I find myself in Pheasant default mode. 
I try to channel a kind of paint by numbers, light, bright and breezy inner voice but unfortunately school playgrounds  just turn me into an awkward stuttery, say weird things at wrong moments type.
It seems, however, old you get, even if you're grown up enough to be a granny next
March, the school playground is still the school playground, hmmmm.

By the way, I am having so much fun teaching Boo at the moment. She has reached the age where she is able to get on with her own work while I get on with mine. We converse, joke around, play games and go out while also being able to actually get stuff done and feel accomplished. It feels very unusually un-chaotic. :)

Curriculum wise, we have talked about the subjects we want to cover and researched resources online and at the library. We are sticking to a loose and flexible time table to make sure we get to cover a little of each subject over the course of the week.
Here is a list of some of the resources we are using:

At the moment we are studying Astronomy using these books:
From Ptolemy's Dark Spheres to Dark Energy by John Farndon
New Astronomy by Carole Stott
Atlas of Space by Scholastic
The Usbourne book of Science experiments 
Marvin and Milo's Adventures in Science

These websites:
Science Kids

French using these books:
Ana Lomba's Storybook Series with CD
Hop, skip and sing in French
Lucy Chat series
I can read French series
French without tears (Bk, 1 &2)
Usbourne French for Beginners

I am using Sat's textbooks for English 
We are reading The Mill on the Floss for vocabulary
The Usbourne Make your own Storybook is a wonderful creative writing resource.
We are reading and talking about a poem a week. Usually chosen from this book.
We also have an hours quiet reading everyday. At the moment Boo is reading War Horse by Michael Morpurgo.

For Maths we are using:
Letts Maths revision text book
Carol Vordemans Fractions and Decimals Made Easy 
And lots of Khan Acaemy :)

For Geography we are working through 
Letts Geography revision 13-14
With extra back up from this site.

For history we are creating a time line using this online resource.
We are also reading A Street Through Time by Steve Noon and Dr Anne Millard

Art lessons are supplied by these fantastic you tube tutorials by Illustrator Mark Crilly.
She is also  doing some fun and informal Italian with her Dad before bed if she's not too tired.

Oh and Emmy does a half hour piano lesson with her on Saturdays.

The sticky subject of exams and the weird and wonderful hoops home schoolers have to jump through in order to actually sit them is not something I'm going to get too concerned with this year.
All I know is she is glad to be home and I'm glad to have her and we're going to take it one step at a time.


  1. I think we all have slightly different voices depending on where we are and who we're with and that's ok - I'm with you on the school gate being a daunting place though! It sounds like your at home school gate is a pretty lovely place to be though :)

  2. Beautiful sunflowers. I think our inner voices change constantly with every movement. I don't think that changes who you are though.

  3. Your post, brings to mind, an old view of mine. :-) 'Old' as in long-held. That it is perfectly fine, for us to "be many people"... Not in a scary, split personality way. In the way, you speak of... Using your "inner voice", which changes, as the example.

    I know I am 'different people,' in different circumstances. Mostly depending on whom I am with. In Real Life and in Cyber Life. I have a range of views, and they are voiced, according to my 'surroundings.' If I know, a view will not be accepted in certain company, I keep it to myself. Letting it free, when in surroundings, where it will be allowed.

    I can't imagine what it must be like, to always, always, always be the same person!!!! Never needing to monitor one's words. Etc. Only having one set of views, words, beliefs, attitudes, longings, abilities.......

    Gentle hugs,

  4. I'm glad you're having fun teaching your Boo, I'm enjoying my Alex. Right now he is reading all about writing character analysis papers and I'm reading blogs ;). I love Kahn Academy and have found it very helpful on this homeschool path.
    PS- most of the time I like to be quiet too. :)

  5. So happy you are enjoying your days with Boo. It sounds like you guys have found your groove :) As for the interval voice, I agree with you, I think it changes depending on where we are, who we are with, how we are feeling and so one.

  6. We do change, as we learn and grow. I struggle too with authenticity ever since becoming a mama. It was so much easier to feel free to be mysellf when there was much less at stake ... no family counting on me, no daughter looking to me for direction. And yet the irony is that I wish to teach her to be free to be and love herself. Oh another lesson for me to grow through :)

  7. I think I would be just like you in the school playground. I didn't really like being there as a child, I am not sure it will be any different as an adult. I feel blessed that it is not somewhere I have to hang out. Your groove sounds like a lovely place to be, long may it continue to be :)

  8. I meant to say that I read a really interesting set of books on the history of astronomy, earlier this year. They are historical fiction based on facts. There are three books in the series by the author Stuart Clark.


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